I’ll be honest.
I miss being in love.
And I don’t use the word Love lightly.
Some people use Love liberally, Spreading it’s usage over every little object of desire.
I refer to real, aching, can’t sleep type of love.
The hungry, sweaty, “is this what insanity feels like type love.”
The kind of love that makes you feel like a fool no matter what you say.
The voice quivering, time stopping, seeing their face in statue of perfection type love.
It wasn’t that long ago that i was sneaking into bedrooms and pissing off parents.
I remember nights of nothing but just feeling warmth.
bodies curved, silhouetted in the sheets counting down the hours till dawn.
I would never sleep those night.
Laying awake in the bed soaking into every moment because i knew daylight would take me away.
I miss missing you.
I miss throwing myself into every instance living without consequence.
I miss being addicted, and needing you now.
My mode has cooled.
Love has been secondary to my life.
Seeing you i see the future before me without you.
Because I’lll be gone in a year and my mind is way too organized to make this time investment.
The movement calls and her voice makes me realize everything else is secondary.
Maybe next lifetime I can be happy.
But right now I got too much work.
(Subject to revision should another situation arise)
i wish work could distract me more
Aw, kid. Been there, when I was your age. Lesson learned : don’t compromise on love with work. We do hard work, social justice fighters, there is always going to be some battle to travel to. But if love is there – staring right back at you – grab it. And if it’s real, true love, it’ll follow you through your work, and make your work sweeter tasting. It’ll be easy if it was meant to be. Doing this work without love is just kinda pointless in the end…
“I refer to real, aching, can’t sleep type of love.
The hungry, sweaty, “is this what insanity feels like type love.”
The kind of love that makes you feel like a fool no matter what you say.
The voice quivering, time stopping, seeing their face in statue of perfection type love.”
oh man…this is the best kinda love. i know exactly what you’re talking about.
imma be honest.
i miss it too.
“But if love is there – staring right back at you – grab it. And if it’s real, true love, it’ll follow you through your work, and make your work sweeter tasting.” –Tazzy Star
Great line!
Hope you can find the kind of love that could compromise with your lifestyle. =)
Maybe happiness can be achieved along the way.
yo i feel u man. co-sign w/ Tazzy Star. cliche but true: love finds u when u least expect it. that’s been my experience and some of my folks. how i approach it is this. all relationships are practice relationships esp. when u’re young. everything u go through is to prepare u to be the best partner/lover u can be. these droughts taught me to be much more appreciative when love happens and not be complacent and take it for granted as i did in the past. once u got love for urself, ur peoples, ur work than romantic love will fall into place.